Good day, readers! Happy Halloween! I have so much to write about and so little time to do it! It’s a good problem to have; an active mind is a healthy mind. I don’t want to start accumulating cobwebs up there, or in there, or out there, or wherever. What I’m trying to say is I don’t want to end up with bats in the belfry (which, while I’m mentioning it, is an excellent song by the band Dispatch—I’ll drop a link in the post so you can listen).

Yesterday I got long-winded talking about my path through music-making, leading up to my band, Jared and The Jewelers. That was such a fun experience. I needed that outlet for the restless energy I was experiencing at that point in my life. Then, I was nearing 30. My longtime girlfriend of seven years and I were growing apart and realizing we were not meant for one another. Dissolving such a long bong of love and companionship is difficult, to put it mildly, and many things in my life were coming to a head. It was a tumultuous period emotionally for me. I had also been struggling with pretty severe alcoholism for years. I had quit drinking twice, and I was having a hard time with feelings of loneliness and isolation. It was one of my absolute rock-bottom moments in life.

But in times of stress and anguish, I sometimes find myself inspired to create as a way to shed some of that psychic weight. So I turned to my music and remembered how alive it made me feel. If there’s some type of DNA-related attribute related to music, I’m a textbook case—it feels like I have a soul-level connection to it. And it saved me. I gave up drinking again, and I replaced that habit with practicing, writing, recording, and running.

My day job at the time was in the legal field in various roles like litigation assistant, legal assistant, paralegal, etc. It was entirely unsatisfying to me, but it paid enough for me to get by at the time. It also charged me up with energy throughout the week that I was able to let out at shows, either as an audience member or as a performer.

I will write a longer post about the full band experience at some point, but for today I wanted to share what the band meant to me at that time in my life. It wasn’t an attempt to get rich and famous (because that would be delusional and awful, anyway) or to get attention or anything. I think it was my lifeline—my own unique way of working through my inner demons and having a good excuse to connect with new people over a shared passion. I am stronger now, and I’ve learned to love ad be gentle with myself. And I have countless memories to treasure. Thanks for reading, I hope all have a great day.

—Jared Caraway